After I made my decision to retain K. Lance Gould, M.D. as my disease reversal specialist my symptoms became much worse producing a nightmarish drive to the hospital, Emergency Department Processing and admittance to a coronary unit pending my 5th heart catheterization the next morning. During the long night I had a lot of time to evaluate where I thought life experience had brought me.
I can only liken this experience to what an alcoholic might need to experience to satisfy themselves they had indeed reached bottom and now it was time for the reverse course upwards. I can also liken it to individuals who have made the final decision for suicide and are pleased and relieved while finalizing their exit plan. I can also compare it to a specific time in 1968 when I was lying at the bottom of a foxhole with bullets nipping through the dirt and flipping on me. My predominant thoughts at the time were in this order: 1) why didn't I dig this hole deeper; and, 2) if I get out of this mess I promise to become a preacher and spread the word.
The pain in my chest was very significant and was made worse with any amount of movement such as stairs or walking to the restroom. My procedure time came and because I was an old Pro at this I had less anxiety about the process. I almost knew everyone on a first name basis on the heart catheterization team. I was warmly received by my Interventional Cardiologist and we were both shaking our heads over the need for me to be undergoing this procedure. The procedure started and I actually drifted off either as a result of conscious sedation or as a result of fatigue from my experience.
It was the oddest experience to be told afterwards that my coronary vessels were perfect and there was no sign of blockage. Oh boy, sucker punched by my brain working in cahoots with my body! This required a great deal of soul searching and being truthful to myself. It also required me to stop relying on anecdotal information. Per my wife's suggestion I started a detailed log of when I had chest pain and what I activities I was engaged in at the time. I encourage you to do this as well.
| Anecdotes are unreliable for various reasons. Stories are prone to contamination by beliefs, later experiences, feedback, selective attention to details, and so on. Most stories get distorted in the telling and the retelling. Events get exaggerated. Time sequences get confused. Details get muddled. Memories are imperfect and selective; they are often filled in after the fact. People misinterpret their experiences. |
After I selected K. Lance Gould, M.D. as my disease reversal specialist I visited him in Houston to begin my reversal journey. He is a researcher, teacher and a highly regarded clinician. Part of the process of reversing cardiovascular heart disease is to accurately figure out what you have been doing to get you to the point of disease manifestation. This is part detective work and counselor combined with clinician and intuitive reasoning. On my second visit with continuing chest pain he nailed me in a way that I had not expected. He told me he thought I was a "pretty Amped up guy".
This comment allowed me to rethink myself in ways that a "Type A" person is not often willing to do. We are big doers and getting things done makes us happy rather than putting a whole lot of thought into it. It turns out that I have always had a low level amount of anxiety; my life examined through a different filter allowed me to better understand choices and directions that I had made that have profoundly shaped my life. WOW! It sure makes you think. Then I needed to execute a different plan of approach.
There was simply no question that I needed a different plan; my current one was producing a death outcome. My new plan started with getting chilled down with a low maintenance dose of anti-anxiety medication. I guess I thought everyone had to manage what they feel as much as I did. It continued in my case with confronting my choice to work in a high stress environment and on to things such as mundane financial planning, eliminating a mortgage and processing through a different image about how I defined myself and what I am as a person.
The take away message about this issue of stress is that you too have arrived at an important juncture emotionally, intellectually and clinically or you wouldn't still be reading. Your best plan and the choices you have made giving you the life you lead will predictably result in an earlier than desired death without change. The earlier you come to grips with whatever your stressors might be the smoother your new course can take.
You have reason to be optimistic if you make real changes and stick with them. Not everyone needs to retire to a deserted island and ponder their belly button for their plan to work. If you read through my lab test display you will find a very sad fact about me. When I was 45, I found a plan, I was able to get my results under control and then I let it slip away by not sticking with it; I got off track with the choices I made in my career. My new plan was required to make up for this lost opportunity and I have done so. I likely however would live longer if I had remained with the earlier plan.
I have self disclosed my mistakes with the intent to give you a real example of missed opportunity. I can only hope you will be motivated to learn from my mistakes, and figure out your stressors as part of your new plan and reap the same positive results that I have achieved with my reversal program.